The Job From Hell

It's been a LONG week; thank god it's over! So since my last post, I have been trying my hardest to do better at work but I don't feel like I've gotten anywhere. I ask questions and try to do better, but I feel like the doctor still hates me. Luckily I haven't caught anyone talking behind my back this week. However, I overheard a group of techs talking about a party that's next weekend. This party is a bachelorette party going on a week before the tech's wedding, and I was never invited to the party. I don't know if it was intentional or what, but it kinda sucks not being included when I thought I was friends with this person. It just goes to show how included I'm NOT at my work. Also, I thought things were going well with my doctor. Yesterday was surgery day, and half of our surgeries canceled that morning. That left us with 2 kitty dentals, both of which had to be done by the dental tech. I spent most of that morning trying to look busy and filling in where needed since neither the dental tech nor the doctor allowed me to help with anything. How am I supposed to get more comfortable with anesthesia if they don't allow me to have experience? It's almost as if they want me to do horrible so they can fire me, or maybe that is just in my head. I don't know anymore. Again today, I thought things were going well. Then I couldn't get an angry cat in his carrier. I guess I should have put my hand in the cage and had it ripped to shreds instead of asking for help because the doctor got annoyed when I asked for help. And I didn't even ask her! I asked another tech; the doctor just happened to walk back at the same time as the other tech. Oh well. I wish she would just be honest with me so I know why she hates me so much. I don't know what I'm doing wrong. I ask for help when I need it, but she gets annoyed when I do. It's almost like one of my teachers in my anes/surg class; she was older too. Maybe its a traditional vet thing. Whatever it is, I wish it would leave the air of my clinic. I used to like waking up and going to work every morning. Now I am dreading every day and counting down til the weekend, or til my day off just so I can get away from everyone. I find myself hiding in the basement every night and on my days off because I just want to be away from them all. I thought my career was supposed to be fun; boy was I wrong there.